** Eighteen **

My feet hurt so bad today

it's been like that for the past few days

the heels are freaking killing me!!!

well...

i had make up on today

which practically sucked...

felt the urge to lick off the lipstick

ahhhh...

my face felt so fake

so THAT'S what it feels like when people wear make up

F
A
K
E

******************

i feel terrible at the moment

i wonder what did i do wrong

i wonder what happened

maybe it's me that's the problem

today was the worst

i had minutely doses of

"Kong, you look like a girl now"

"Kong, you look like a doll"

"Kong, you're so lady like now"

"Kong, you're so pretty"

"Kong, you're so cute with make up"

"Kong, i like your dress"

"Kong, you look like a barbie doll"

"Kong, your lips so nice"

"Kong, your make up suits you"

and the list goes on

and all i do is

nod

smile

nod

smile

nod

smile

*****************

a short post today...^^

i'll spare the readers

long hours of staring at my post reading them...

xD

Hydde: I aint free Saturday...i got music class, POTO and stuff

[and u'd probably ask wht stuff again]

**********

POTO is in few days time!!!!

gosh....

i'm a bit freaked out

but then again

i can't wait for it to be over

i'm suffering one way or the other...

******************

maybe one day...i might just totally forget about my blog...xD

...

NAHHHHH

...

me stop blogging just proves my dad's point

that its a waste of time

which

it is not...xD

ok WTF am i crapping now?!?!?!

[damn rachel ur such a crapper]

*******************

is it okay

for your ex to return to you

after more than 2 years

since your ex broke up with you

is it okay

to watch your friend

walk away with someone

you like and might even love

and you

were the one that got them together [being a friend and all]

is it okay

to shuffle so many

of those courting you

for so long

and yet

you're indecisive of who to really say "yes" to

and they're dying for you to say it

is it okay

to be with someone

and think it's true love

but holds on

even when you know that someone's

no longer yours

is it okay

to secretly love someone

for exactly four year

with that someone knowing it

even if you tried telling

but the words wouldnt come

is it okay

to feel as if

you are living for no one else

but that someone

and that someone tore you to shreds

left you bleeding

and that someone doesn't even know it

is it okay

when life feels so much more better

when that someone's around

burdens lifted

worries disappear

sorrows distort

is it okay

to be with that someone

but

be in love with that someone's sibling

is it okay

that the name the haunts you

your name doesnt haunt it

is it okay

to know that we're from entirely different worlds

and being an "us"

isn't going to work

yet

you still want it to happen

is it okay

if i said no

is it okay

if i said yes

is it okay

if i died tomorrow

nothing's okay anymore

now is it?

nothing's okay anymore

now is it?

nothing's okay anymore

now is it?

nothing's okay anymore

now is it?

anyone

anybody

someone

somebody

make it all better

please