20 September 2009

**Hundred and Fourty Nine**

tick tock. time's against me now.

SPM's in a month's plus time and i proud to say I AM NOT PREPARED.

somehow i just wished i could stay in school. yeah maybe the load of homework sucks and how the teachers tend to be bitches at times. and the worst case is where we'd have to get up early. drag ourselves out of bed and go to school.

i hate making decisions.

and right now i HAVE to make decisions. and honestly i do not know what to do. what to think. so dad wants me to do Form6. and my "awesome" mother just signed me up for some kerajaan marticulation programme. and if i do get it...i'm gonna be sent away. gosh i sound so dead blogging today.

honestly i feel really messed up right now.
so mum thinks i talk differently from how i act. or whatever she means. i do not understand. its not i dont care. its i dont want to care. i dont want to give a damn what the world has instored. i dont want to give a damn what anyone thinks. i dont want to give a damn anymore.

i'm so sick and tired of giving everyone a damn.

SHUT UP STUPID PLAYER!!!! sorry...i'm going nuts...

well i screwed up my trials if that's what you're asking. surprisingly i got LOWEST for Physics paper3. when i saw the paper i was like WTF. i got like 2/10 for my experiment. 2/10. i was expecting my bio to be the lowest.

chemistry is saved thanks to Pn Grace's teaching *bows*

i dont feel like going back to school. and get back all my papers. and see how badly i did. heck if i cant even get through trials how the fuck am i gonna get through SPM. and no doubt for the next month or so everyone is gonna bug me about SPM. of how SPM is coming and how SPM determines my future. BLAH BLAH BLAH.

puhleeezeee...tell it to someone who doesnt know.

i think this is the millionth time i've said i'd go and study.

honestly i haven't been studying. except for the last minute cramping.


i dont know why. everything feels so messed up right now. i just want to crawl back into my burrow and stay there. i dont care how long it takes for the storm to pass.

i dont want to dance in the rain.

0 complaints: